It has been implanted in our brains by our television screens, our books, our fairytale DVDs, our parents, our friends, and our culture. The idea can be so detrimental to our lives because it affects different parts of our lives in many ways.
Strong, Masculine, Hero, ‘Knight in Shining Armor’, Powerful, Protector, Prince Charming.
What comes to your mind as you hear those words/phrases?
More often than not, in many Cultures, these are the words used to describe a man.
In our society, men are supposed to be all of these things plus more. And if they fall outside of these requirements they are often looked down upon and looked at as weak.
How many times have you witnessed a guy being called a sissy because he didn’t catch the baseball, or he wanted to take the Home economics class instead of Auto-tech, or he was smaller than his peers, or because he didn’t know how to fix his car? These are the lies that our society has fed us.
The Bible has a different view of the characteristics a man should aspire to have.
From the Bible we can gather that God wants a man to:
1. Live by God’s example. In Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her”.
2. Be a team with his partner. Genesis 2:24 we read, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh".
3. Loving. 1 Peter 3:7 “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect…”
4. God-fearing. Deuteronomy 6:1-9 “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength”
The Bible does not describe the ideal man to be someone who doesn’t cry (after-all, Jesus wept), is good at sports, knows what, when, and how to talk to a woman. Every man is different. Men were not meant to be Prince Charming or the Knight in Shining Armor.
We have to change our view of how we perceive a “Real man”. Until we do that, we will always search or aspire for something that doesn’t exist. If you’re a woman, you will not be able to recognize who God has sent for you because you’re too busy looking for a Prince riding on his white horse, or in today's times, a 2012 BMW. Instead of looking down upon the man who doesn’t wear the latest fashion or drive the newest car, give him a second look. He might have all the important stuff on your list (and we’ll get to that list later).
For males, with so many opinions on who you’re supposed to be, what you’re supposed to be like and how you’re supposed to be it, I encourage you to let go of society’s lies and be who you are and embrace the truths of the Bible. This fairytale idea can be so damaging because you are placed in this tug of war between society’s rules that are constantly changing. God created you unique, don’t try and fit into another person’s idea of perfection.
LU
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Monday, December 19, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Are you worth the wait?
The story of Rachel and Jacob is a very interesting one. It has all the makings of a good plot. We have the young man, beautiful lady, sweat, tears, humiliation, love and hate. No fairytale.
I’ll give you a brief summary:
In Genesis 29 Jacob meets up with his friends at ‘the spot’ and everyone’s there; his friend from school, this guy he met at the market and this beautiful girl. Her name is Rachel. Long story short, he tries to impress her by doing something that showed off his strength and his masculinity. And he succeeds because she likes it, goes home and tells her daddy (Laban) about this boy and soon after Jacob moves in with them. While working with Laban, Jacob falls in love with Rachel and asks him if he can work and get paid with Rachel’s hand in marriage. Laban agrees. So Jacob sweats, he shed tears, he works hard for SEVEN years so he can get his dream girl. After the seven years was finished, he found out that he had to marry the eldest daughter first; her name is Leah, because that was the law. However, he still wanted Rachel and his Uncle allowed him to marry Rachel if he would work an additional seven years. Would you do that? Well, Jacob did. The story goes on further in Genesis and talks about how Leah was jealous of the love Jacob gave Rachel and thought she would get back at her by having 6 kids with him and because Rachel wasn’t able to have kids, she was also jealous and felt humiliated by her medical issue. Later on, when she stopped stressing so much, she gave birth to a son. (Read the story, it’s very interesting.)
Jacob ended up working for Rachel a total of fourteen years.
We live in such a fast paced society. We want our meals right away, our money right away, shipping needs to be overnight, the food needs to be micro-waved and we need to take off 30lbs in 5 days. It’s what we have been accustomed to getting in this society with everyone and everything moving so fast. With that said, it becomes hard to understand the concept of waiting, praying without ceasing, or holding steadfast.
Many times we settle. Where did it get you? God wants us to live out our dreams and be happy! And settling is the equivalent to regret, not happiness. Knowing who we are, what our purpose is, and learning how to live out our talents to Praise God are things that will help keep us from settling. They are things that will help us with waiting on God. God created you special and doesn’t want you to settle for second best. After all, He created you a masterpiece.
The last point taken from this message is simple: You are also worth it.
Worth the wait.
Worth the effort.
Worth the truth.
Worth the risk.
You are worth it.
Have you read this chapter? What did you find most interesting about the story of Rachel and Jacob?
LU
Join LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
I’ll give you a brief summary:
In Genesis 29 Jacob meets up with his friends at ‘the spot’ and everyone’s there; his friend from school, this guy he met at the market and this beautiful girl. Her name is Rachel. Long story short, he tries to impress her by doing something that showed off his strength and his masculinity. And he succeeds because she likes it, goes home and tells her daddy (Laban) about this boy and soon after Jacob moves in with them. While working with Laban, Jacob falls in love with Rachel and asks him if he can work and get paid with Rachel’s hand in marriage. Laban agrees. So Jacob sweats, he shed tears, he works hard for SEVEN years so he can get his dream girl. After the seven years was finished, he found out that he had to marry the eldest daughter first; her name is Leah, because that was the law. However, he still wanted Rachel and his Uncle allowed him to marry Rachel if he would work an additional seven years. Would you do that? Well, Jacob did. The story goes on further in Genesis and talks about how Leah was jealous of the love Jacob gave Rachel and thought she would get back at her by having 6 kids with him and because Rachel wasn’t able to have kids, she was also jealous and felt humiliated by her medical issue. Later on, when she stopped stressing so much, she gave birth to a son. (Read the story, it’s very interesting.)
Jacob ended up working for Rachel a total of fourteen years.
We live in such a fast paced society. We want our meals right away, our money right away, shipping needs to be overnight, the food needs to be micro-waved and we need to take off 30lbs in 5 days. It’s what we have been accustomed to getting in this society with everyone and everything moving so fast. With that said, it becomes hard to understand the concept of waiting, praying without ceasing, or holding steadfast.
Many times we settle. Where did it get you? God wants us to live out our dreams and be happy! And settling is the equivalent to regret, not happiness. Knowing who we are, what our purpose is, and learning how to live out our talents to Praise God are things that will help keep us from settling. They are things that will help us with waiting on God. God created you special and doesn’t want you to settle for second best. After all, He created you a masterpiece.
The last point taken from this message is simple: You are also worth it.
Worth the wait.
Worth the effort.
Worth the truth.
Worth the risk.
You are worth it.
Have you read this chapter? What did you find most interesting about the story of Rachel and Jacob?
LU
Join LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Please print this and add to your Church Bulletin!
WANTED
Seventh Day Adventist Singles
Are you ready for a REAL relationship? One with God as the center?
Get started today at:
LoveUnthorned.com
A NEW social networking site ONLY for SDA Singles. It’s FREE and it’s more than a Social Networking Site. Full of info about Loving God, Loving Self and Finding Love, God’s way! Go sign up! You won’t regret it!
Follow us: @LoveUnthorned
‘like’ us on Facebook: LoveUnthorned
L L L L L L L L L L L L L L L
O O O O O O O O O O O O O O O
V V V V V V V V V V V V V V V
E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E
U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U
N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N
H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H
O O O O O O O O O O O O O O O
R R R R R R R R R R R R R R R
N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N
E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E
D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
C C C C C C C C C C C C C C C
O O O O O O O O O O O O O O O
M M M M M M M M M M M M M M M
Self-Forgiveness
I’m sure we have all been to a church where the topic was forgiving others; forgive your mom, your brother, the ex, and the next. Forgiveness is mentioned in the Bible several times and includes verses such as Colossians 12-13 that states:
“Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. “
In this verse, the Bible teaches that we should be forgiving to each other just as God has forgiven us. The Bible also states in Matthew 18:21-22
“Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, until seven times: but, until seventy times seven”
So that verse teaches us that we should forgive that person over and over again when they have done wrong to us.
Forgiveness of others is important. When we hold grudges in our hearts for another person, we give them a certain control over us and our emotions. Learning to let go of that hurt can be difficult but it will only be rewarding to you physically, emotionally and spiritually.
How many times have you been to church where the topic was on Self- forgiveness? Many people do not believe that we need to forgive ourselves for the hurt we might have caused others, or the hurt we might have caused ourselves. Some believe that forgiving ourselves places us above God, who says in 1John 1:9
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness”
Therefore, if God will forgive us of the sins that we have committed, why would it be important to forgive our-selves?
On the other hand, many people suffer by holding on to the grudges, criticism and hurt they have caused themselves or others. With this, many people believe that healing begins after confessing our sins to God, accepting His forgiveness and allowing ourselves to forgive our-selves for the things we have done wrong.
What is your take on this topic? And what is your reasoning? Would love to hear from you all. Is it important to forgive ourselves? Or should we only forgive others and confess our sins so God can forgive us?
LU
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
“Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. “
In this verse, the Bible teaches that we should be forgiving to each other just as God has forgiven us. The Bible also states in Matthew 18:21-22
“Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, until seven times: but, until seventy times seven”
So that verse teaches us that we should forgive that person over and over again when they have done wrong to us.
Forgiveness of others is important. When we hold grudges in our hearts for another person, we give them a certain control over us and our emotions. Learning to let go of that hurt can be difficult but it will only be rewarding to you physically, emotionally and spiritually.
How many times have you been to church where the topic was on Self- forgiveness? Many people do not believe that we need to forgive ourselves for the hurt we might have caused others, or the hurt we might have caused ourselves. Some believe that forgiving ourselves places us above God, who says in 1John 1:9
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness”
Therefore, if God will forgive us of the sins that we have committed, why would it be important to forgive our-selves?
On the other hand, many people suffer by holding on to the grudges, criticism and hurt they have caused themselves or others. With this, many people believe that healing begins after confessing our sins to God, accepting His forgiveness and allowing ourselves to forgive our-selves for the things we have done wrong.
What is your take on this topic? And what is your reasoning? Would love to hear from you all. Is it important to forgive ourselves? Or should we only forgive others and confess our sins so God can forgive us?
LU
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
LoveUnthorned Logo Explanation
The thorns around the heart symbolize the pain, the hurt, the need, and the vulnerability. The pain our last relationships caused us, the hurt we feel because of our moving away from Christ, the need for something better and the vulnerability it causes for us to be hurt again. This is the way we used to think about love.
The releasing of the thorns symbolizes the openness, the desire, the love, and the change. The openness so that God can mend our past hurts, the desire for finding love the Adventist way, the love being revamped and revived in our hearts for God and the change that will definitely come if we allow God to work through us. The way God intended love to be.
At the top of the heart is the thorn tightening its grip, trying to hold on to us so that we will be broken forever. However, by following God's will, the thorns start to release at the bottom to let go of the brokenness and hurt. After reconnecting with God, your heart becomes open to accept the love He intended for you.
LoveUnthorned works to help release the thorns from your heart so that you can love the way God intended in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8; Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
LU
Join now at LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
The releasing of the thorns symbolizes the openness, the desire, the love, and the change. The openness so that God can mend our past hurts, the desire for finding love the Adventist way, the love being revamped and revived in our hearts for God and the change that will definitely come if we allow God to work through us. The way God intended love to be.
At the top of the heart is the thorn tightening its grip, trying to hold on to us so that we will be broken forever. However, by following God's will, the thorns start to release at the bottom to let go of the brokenness and hurt. After reconnecting with God, your heart becomes open to accept the love He intended for you.
LoveUnthorned works to help release the thorns from your heart so that you can love the way God intended in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8; Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
LU
Join now at LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
About LoveUnthorned
Let us dare to rethink love. Let us dare to put the past behind us and allow God to heal our hearts and flow through us so that we can really meet our God-given partner. Before we do that, we have to face it and come to terms with the fact that love is not a fairytale; and Prince Charming probably will not be riding on his white horse to rescue you. Let us face it that love was not meant to be selfish, where ones wants overpower ones self control. God is love and that makes love selfless.
We all have some kind of thorns around our hearts from different things. Maybe it is because your mom abandoned you, your father abused you sexually, emotionally, or physically, or maybe your friend betrayed you, your child takes advantage of you, your ex abused you emotionally, physically and or spiritually or maybe you just have not found that one person you feel God wants you to spend forever with. Whatever the reason is, here at LoveUnthorned, we want to help you let go of the thorns and allow God to lead you to something better.
Our aim is to Praise God; to worship Him with our hearts and our bodies. Being Seventh Day Adventist means being a part of the remnant of God, it means that we are called to a higher calling. Love is harder when you are held at a higher standard. Being with someone who does not understand and respect our beliefs is a disaster waiting to happen. Our aim is to help connect the hearts of fellow minded Seventh Day Adventists so that you can find the LOVE that God intended for you. He/she exists but sometimes we are too busy to find them. This site, allows you to find God so that He can lead you to your true love.
LU
Join now at LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
We all have some kind of thorns around our hearts from different things. Maybe it is because your mom abandoned you, your father abused you sexually, emotionally, or physically, or maybe your friend betrayed you, your child takes advantage of you, your ex abused you emotionally, physically and or spiritually or maybe you just have not found that one person you feel God wants you to spend forever with. Whatever the reason is, here at LoveUnthorned, we want to help you let go of the thorns and allow God to lead you to something better.
Our aim is to Praise God; to worship Him with our hearts and our bodies. Being Seventh Day Adventist means being a part of the remnant of God, it means that we are called to a higher calling. Love is harder when you are held at a higher standard. Being with someone who does not understand and respect our beliefs is a disaster waiting to happen. Our aim is to help connect the hearts of fellow minded Seventh Day Adventists so that you can find the LOVE that God intended for you. He/she exists but sometimes we are too busy to find them. This site, allows you to find God so that He can lead you to your true love.
LU
Join now at LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
Single and Loving It
We’ve all been there at some point or the other. Single.
And hopefully we have all been at a point in our lives where we loved it. Whether or not being Single and Loving it came at the same time is a different story. Easier said than done right?
What does it mean anyway to be single and loving it?
It really just means being okay with who you are. Taking the time to find out who you are and what you want (in life, goals, and values) will help you to find a mate that will be compatible with you and your goals. The Bible says that you were fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God (Psalm 139:14), born with a purpose. The Bible actually gives us guidelines to follow while single. It says that when single, our only concern should be how to please God (1 Corinthians 7:32) and that includes being active in your church, volunteering, using your time in a way that is pleasing to God.
Some of us are so involved in finding the one that we forget that we have not yet even found ourselves. Do all the things you would do with your mate, with yourself for a change. Spending time trying to figure out your needs, your goals, what are your values (aside from the ones ‘given’ to you by your parents). Do they align with the ones your parents have? Or do you value different things and want different things? Dating yourself for a while; candle lit dinner, going to watch a movie, and buying yourself flowers or that cologne you would want your partner to buy you. Why wait? You deserve it! And you certainly don’t have to wait for someone to come along and purchase them for you to show you that you are worth it.
Different ways to figure out who you are:
• Read the Bible – Its full of information about your purpose
• Google “Christian Who am I?” and “Self Improvement” worksheets
• Journaling
• Being honest with yourself about the things you like about you and the things you can
work on
• Seeing a therapist/church counselor to help guide you on this journey to self discovery
Amongst many other things.
Taking the time to really put effort into self reflection can be difficult, nevertheless it is very rewarding. When you know who you are, someone can’t tell you who to be, how to act and what type of fairytale they want to live through you. It’s worth it. You are worth it! Start believing it! You don’t need to be with a man/woman to be happy! You just have to be you.
LU
Join now at LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
And hopefully we have all been at a point in our lives where we loved it. Whether or not being Single and Loving it came at the same time is a different story. Easier said than done right?
What does it mean anyway to be single and loving it?
It really just means being okay with who you are. Taking the time to find out who you are and what you want (in life, goals, and values) will help you to find a mate that will be compatible with you and your goals. The Bible says that you were fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God (Psalm 139:14), born with a purpose. The Bible actually gives us guidelines to follow while single. It says that when single, our only concern should be how to please God (1 Corinthians 7:32) and that includes being active in your church, volunteering, using your time in a way that is pleasing to God.
Some of us are so involved in finding the one that we forget that we have not yet even found ourselves. Do all the things you would do with your mate, with yourself for a change. Spending time trying to figure out your needs, your goals, what are your values (aside from the ones ‘given’ to you by your parents). Do they align with the ones your parents have? Or do you value different things and want different things? Dating yourself for a while; candle lit dinner, going to watch a movie, and buying yourself flowers or that cologne you would want your partner to buy you. Why wait? You deserve it! And you certainly don’t have to wait for someone to come along and purchase them for you to show you that you are worth it.
Different ways to figure out who you are:
• Read the Bible – Its full of information about your purpose
• Google “Christian Who am I?” and “Self Improvement” worksheets
• Journaling
• Being honest with yourself about the things you like about you and the things you can
work on
• Seeing a therapist/church counselor to help guide you on this journey to self discovery
Amongst many other things.
Taking the time to really put effort into self reflection can be difficult, nevertheless it is very rewarding. When you know who you are, someone can’t tell you who to be, how to act and what type of fairytale they want to live through you. It’s worth it. You are worth it! Start believing it! You don’t need to be with a man/woman to be happy! You just have to be you.
LU
Join now at LoveUnthorned.com
Follow us on Twitter @LoveUnthorned
‘Like’ us on Facebook
loveunthorned.blogspot.com
Contact us to speak about us at your church at loveunthorned@gmail.com
Monday, January 31, 2011
Thursday, January 6, 2011
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